They say 'you are how you coach'. A typically clever coachy thing to say. But it's true, my life experience and learning characterise my approach.
Born in London in 1972, raised in middle-class Buckinghamshire, I was a prodigious academic and musical child, and very unruly. My dad (a musician) died when I was 13, ending my musical enthusiasm and beginning a lifelong journey with masculine identity, grief and retrieving creative purpose.
By the time I was 16 I thought I knew everything. Then a psychedelic experience shattered my clever little world-view, and started a lifelong interest in personal transformation and enquiry into the unknown (and some dark chapters of addiction and depression).
I dropped out of university to be an entrepreneur, intoxicated with early stage Bransonitis, and fortuitously stumbled into an Anthony Robbins workshop. Synchronicity, clarity and flow erupted. I went health-mad and got seriously ambitious, with business projects and with spiritual development.
Through the 90s I had a string of successful startups, that all went disastrously wrong. I had cutting-edge ideas (London's first juice bars; an early-stage internet project on sustainability) but was long on inspiration and short on aptitude. Plus, my motivations were all skewed: puffed up with privilege and spiritual ego I was chasing other people's dreams to cover up for unspent grief. I was totally lost, but couldn't see it and when the juice business went down – 50 employees and a lot of debt – I crashed, slowly. I didn't like the worlds I was moving in, or who I was becoming within them. The spiritual groups I'd been involved with had collapsed in politics and delusion, the vivid clarity of my 'awakening' times was a memory. All that was left was morning-pages and my yoga practice. So I got rid of my possessions, bought a guitar and went to India.
I stayed for over 3 years, ending up in business with a friend from Delhi; living downtown, fully immersed. I did a lot of chi kung and yoga; took some amazing pictures, and landed a broadcast film project on call-centres; studied permaculture, biodynamics, biogas systems and took a lot of trains.
I thought I was going to stay, but fortune tripped me up again, into an shamanic ceremony, which swept me off my yoga mat into a deep enquiry of shamanism and some long periods in South America. It also seriously reactivated my social conscience, and I launched another environmental media project.
After 3 years and a lot of trying, it burned out, and took the last of my entrepreneurial zeal with it. As that door was closing I discovered the constellations work and knew instantly that it was the opening I’d been waiting for.
The training and development for me has taken 11 years, along with marriage, two children (and another business). I’m a good example of making it along the long and winding road to a deeper calling.
My practice incorporates threads of all this experience, with a particular focus on helping people to find and develop the work they love (their art) and how to manage a balanced life in the tumult of success.
I’m also passionate about the growth of purpose-driven organisations (or evolutionary organisations, as Frederic Laloux puts it) and coach a couple of wonderful start-ups. After putting down my entrepreneurial ‘hat’, it’s deeply satisfying to find there is a way to put this experience to good use.
If you’d like to find out more, or book a call, make contact now.
Systemic coaching: The Whole Partnership
Systemic Ritual: Daan Van Kampenhout
Family Constellations Practitioner: Centre for Systemic Constellations UK
Non Violent Communication: Foundation and Findhorn Intensive
Process, Shadow work and emotional fluency, 4 year development group: Deep Soul Connection
Chi Kung, yoga and meditation: many week-long, fortnight & 4 week trainings over 25 years
Healing foods and natural lifestyle
Somatics, body intelligence, natural movement
Sexual energy cultivation
Men's circles and retreats
Shamanism, ceremony & sweat lodge